Today's Doofus is from Germany.
A would-be gangster shot himself in the crutch when his gun went off half cocked in his pocket.
Lukas Neuhardt, 27, had forgotten to put the safety catch on when he stuffed the gun into his trouser pocket to impress pals in Saarbruecken, Germany.
He told paramedics that a masked mugger had blasted him in the crutch in a bungled robbery.
But police found a hole in his statement when they saw that the gunshot had miraculously left his trousers intact.
"Instead there was a charred hole in his pocket so either it was the shot of the century or he did it himself," said a police source.
Now - after surgeons stitched his manhood back together - he's facing up to three years in jail for breaching Germany's tough new anti gun laws.
I was going to say that to be so careless, he must have been nuts - but I'm not sure whether nuts are still counted among his assets . . .