That's the title of a very amusing article in the Telegraph today. Here's an excerpt.
2. Don't wait to hear 'fore'
Anyone with the vaguest grasp of golfing etiquette knows you’re supposed to shout “fore” when that embarrassingly wayward drive starts veering off at a fellow player. But whatever the incomprehensible, panicked splutter that emits from your throat as the ball homes in its prey, it rarely sounds much like the number after three.
General rule – if you hear anything resembling a distressed hyena, take cover.
3. Nobody can hit a one iron
Club selection is always a tricky one, but if you ever catch yourself reaching for a low iron, stop and remember the greatest piece of golfing wisdom ever spoken: “If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.”
There's more at the link.
I'm one of those who regards a golf course as an unconscionable waste of a perfectly good rifle range. However, even with that handicap (you should pardon the expression), I definitely enjoyed the author's sense of humor. Recommended.