Saturday, July 5, 2014

I have an evil plan


I couldn't help but chuckle at a Business Insider headline:  "Conservatives Are Purposely Making Their Cars Spew Black Smoke To Protest Obama And Environmentalists".  Apparently there's an entire sub-culture built up around installing chromed pipes on big pickup trucks (the bigger, the better) and making them blow black smoke in large quantities.  They're known as 'coal rollers'.  There are plenty of video clips on YouTube illustrating their noxiousness.




I have a better idea.  I want to install a pair of those pipes on a Toyota Prius, complete with a smoke generator.  Can't you just hear 'green' heads exploding all across the nation?




Peter

17 comments:

Douglas2 said...

Today I watched 4 work colleagues leave together to go to the same event. They walked together to the car-park, and then each got into their own Prius and they set off in a convoy of priuses (priii?).

Anonymous said...

This seems to be the difference between openly carrying an assault rifle in public vs concealed carry; it openly flouts a lack of sense and proportion. If you think that antipollution devices negatively affect your engine's performance (and they do on diesels), disconnect them and be on your way. All this will do is bring on a greater crackdown on everyone.

Antibubba

Murphy's Law said...

I hate those trucks (usually driven around here by rednecks who don't appear to have jobs and probably vote Dem to keep the welfare coming) but I like your idea.

Differ said...

I second Antibubbas point....it's merely antisocial posturing....pour a quart or 2 of 10w-30 down those pipes and wait for the stack fire.

Old NFO said...

Ah yes, stack fires... They get em... and the trucks usually burn down when that happens.

Grog said...

Priii? lol

Here's a video, Peter.

http://knuckledraggin.com/2014/07/rollin-coal-prius/

cspschofield said...

If Liberal Intellectual Radical Progressive heads would explode when confronted with contradictions to common sense that trivial, their heads would explode early in their indoctrinations and they wouldn't be a present problem.

Cute idea, though.

Anonymous said...

Don't talk, do!

You will be awarded an Evil Genius Second Class medal if you post the video.

Gerry

sdharms said...

It is apparent that those commenting on these trucks don't know what they are talking about. how is this any worse than Algore's gargantuan carbon footprint? Or an e- car driver thinking his car is not running on COAL?

Eccentric Cowboy said...

I smiled just like this upon hearing this delightfully despicable plan!
http://losangeles.bitter-lemons.com/files/2013/12/grinch-smile.jpg

Corey said...

They usually put those pipes on diesel trucks. If they get their turbos tuned up good they can't hear anything in the cab. Around here they usually run those stacks until their trucks come off warranty then they can remove all they EPA crap and crank up the turbo so they put regular pipes on again.

Differ said...

To state it is conservatives doing this is a stretch. What is Business Inside's agenda here? From what I've observed in GA it is primarily younger men driving these trucks; a demographic with ill defined political direction. It is however one with limited self control. I personally find a significant percentage of the Prius/other electric car drivers I've encountered to be sactimonious fools entirely deserving of a good smoking....but the overfuelled diesels are equally obnoxious.

Differ said...

It seems a majority of those interested in chpping their diesels for performance are wholly against those who bring adverse attention to diesels with the coal-rolling craze:

http://www.cumminsforum.com/forum/07-5-09-3rd-gen-6-7l-performance-parts-discussion/354528-i-need-roll-coal.html

benEzra said...

AFAIK diesels smoke when they are running rich under full throttle, which helps keep the engine from destroying itself under insane boost levels. That's why you'll usually see a thick smoke plume whenever one of those 1500+ hp diesel trucks is putting down a 9-second quarter mile; the smoke plume is a side effect of the power and boost levels. It also only occurs under full throttle, since smoking all the time would be a really good way to foul up your motor.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORrN6utJuUU

These trucks idle and cruise cleanly if done right. Diesel Power magazine is a good read on the genre, though I'm more into high-revving V6's and cars that can dance.

As to vertical stacks, those are a way to use a large-diameter pipe for good exhaust flow without having to route it through the truck's underbody, and have no effect on smoke generation whatsoever. Some drag trucks use stacks coming out of the hood, but for street trucks it is more practical to have them come up behind the cab. It seems to me that if you wanted to smoke out tailgaters, though, then under-the-bumper pipes would be far better than stacks.

I suppose if one had the ability to generate a smoke screen simply by flooring it, then the temptation to dump on one of those ubiquitous high-beam tailgaters would be overwhelming at times...but that article spinning it as "ZOMG ppl are modding their trucks to offend me" seems to be kind of a reach to me.

Will said...

A sort of related issue:

In CA, when you replace a catalytic convertor, the State Approved type is much smaller than the OEM cat. The OEM one must last at least 100k miles, per fed regs. Mine lasted 150k. Judging by the test results after one year, it will certainly fail the test by the time it goes in for it's CA mandated test that is done every two years.

The problem is that the mandated cats are approx 62-67% volume of the OEM cat. Done by a shop, that is a recurring cost of around $600 to install a new cat every time you get your car smog tested. I'm told that the CARB people who engineered this are bureaucrats and exhaust manufacturers.

These small cats also affect how well the motor runs, as it is a noticeable restriction in exhaust flow, and may also hurt fuel mileage a bit.

It would seem that CA is trying to remove older cars with this rigged setup. This will eventually kill the resale value of cars that are beyond the car makers warrantee.

You can't replace them with an oem cat, since they do not come with CA's approved numbers marking them. Doesn't matter if it passes the test, it must have an approved cat installed, or it fails the visual equipment part of the inspection.

In addition, CA is already changing the smog test numbers on vehicles equipped with a carburetor (pre '87, IIRC), according to a smog tech I know. They no longer will pass.

Coconut said...

It's funny from here, but I suspect if I came across one on the road- and we've got people over here who'd think this is incredibly awesome -I'd be more inclined to premeditated homicide than laughter.

Borepatch said...

Want.