tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post6804994298655543011..comments2024-03-28T23:57:50.103-05:00Comments on Bayou Renaissance Man: It's been a fascinating exchange of viewsPeterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10595089829300831372noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-24361173755488839012016-04-10T19:40:02.369-05:002016-04-10T19:40:02.369-05:00Have you seen Hell On Wheels, the show about build...Have you seen Hell On Wheels, the show about building the transcontinental railroad (last shows coming up this season)?<br />I have, and your story fits in well with the HOW story attitudes.Sam L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/00996809377798862214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-52217433161307188372016-04-06T16:46:22.273-05:002016-04-06T16:46:22.273-05:00I didn't even notice the dialect. Perhaps tha...I didn't even notice the dialect. Perhaps that is because of where I am from. I got drawn in immediately and am ready to buy the book. I thought it was well done.<br />On a side note, a great-great grandfather was released from a Chicago Prison Camp with a rifle (that's it!). After a year or two he walked into town at home in Mississippi. I have often thought about what was involved in surviving that walk. Two Texas relatives were in the same prison camp, one died there, and the other made it home. I never got any of the details of that long trip. Tough people.<br /><br />Sherman's depredations caused hatred long after the war. Heard some terrible stories from Oklahoma relatives that moved from Georgia. One of the grandmothers would not permit a northerner on her property. She witnessed some terrible things as a child in Georgia.<br /><br />Write on, looking for the book!Lesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-44522430178176581132016-04-04T20:59:29.803-05:002016-04-04T20:59:29.803-05:00I enjoyed the tidbit you gave us and am looking fo...I enjoyed the tidbit you gave us and am looking forward to reading the rest of it. It's your book, write it your way. Just let me know when it hits the Kindle store...Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08072589025789986251noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-13999928499124487562016-04-04T18:31:13.579-05:002016-04-04T18:31:13.579-05:00I was surprised by the number of people who were p...I was surprised by the number of people who were put off by the dialect. Doesn't bother me a bit; in fact, it added to the atmosphere for me.<br /><br />@Judy - Damn Yankees is two words?!?Chrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08015544320906146949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-44030688388299992002016-04-04T14:58:56.397-05:002016-04-04T14:58:56.397-05:00I thought it excellent and would gladly buy the bo...I thought it excellent and would gladly buy the book based on the "sample"Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-63614697322813504902016-04-04T06:12:53.051-05:002016-04-04T06:12:53.051-05:00@JohninMD:
You're thinking of the tale of Aun...@JohninMD:<br /><br />You're thinking of the tale of Aunt Jenny Brooks. Never ever underestimate the lengths a hill family will hold a grudge -- especially when blood is spilled.Toastridernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-58207533327403840352016-04-04T04:49:39.190-05:002016-04-04T04:49:39.190-05:00Go with the period language and behaviour. People ...Go with the period language and behaviour. People will slip into it very quickly. Remember how people lapped it up with Rome and Spartacus.<br /><br />You also need a proofreader: 'but weren’t as good as keeping out the rain' for example.Quentinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-69660503603248867362016-04-04T03:32:47.489-05:002016-04-04T03:32:47.489-05:00I liked it just the way you wrote it.
Publish it ...I liked it just the way you wrote it. <br />Publish it and I will buy it. Alexhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00518864406204116421noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-6512751807114117162016-04-03T17:29:43.800-05:002016-04-03T17:29:43.800-05:00I had relatives on both sides.
On my mothers sid...I had relatives on both sides. <br /><br />On my mothers side, Missouri, a confederate uncle had a little finger blown off. <br /><br />Scots Irish with each generation, group of families, moving a bit further West. They finally ended up in California. Started out in Virginia before the revolutionary war.<br /><br />California was full of confederates. Pattons family for example.<br /><br />I thought the number of shots was too low. In real life it seems to take s lot of shots to kill a person.<br /><br />Another anon Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-54720770633936258542016-04-03T16:57:46.136-05:002016-04-03T16:57:46.136-05:00Reading the excerpt I say complete it, put up at A...Reading the excerpt I say complete it, put up at Amazon, I will buy it, read it and enjoy it. <br />bernienonohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10946012129539132762noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-28548045911071731472016-04-03T14:39:09.774-05:002016-04-03T14:39:09.774-05:00Critics, Pffft.
I'm no writer, but I read a lo...Critics, Pffft.<br />I'm no writer, but I read a lot. I notice "flaws" in some of my favorite books but can overlook them if the unity or theme is maintained.<br />Contrast the styles of Manchester and Gilbert in their Churchill biographies.<br />Savor the prose in the Durant history.<br />Enjoy the anachronisms in TH White's Once and Future King.<br />Parse the sentences in Faulkner.<br />Admire the technical handling of the time slips in Raintree County.<br />Compare Steinbeck to Hemingway. Or Tolstoy to Dostoevsky.<br />Could Dickens plot a novel?<br /><br />Read Michener and Somerset Maugham on the art of crafting a novel. <br />I still can't read James Joyce or Tolkien.<br /><br />=BCE56=Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-27148949058431523422016-04-03T14:08:52.340-05:002016-04-03T14:08:52.340-05:00Peter, I think you've got a winner here. Peopl...Peter, I think you've got a winner here. People forget how bloody and dehumanizing the War between the States era was, on both sides. I recall a true story of a Kentucky woman whose husband and eldest boy were murdered by a Confederate pressgang, "drafting" soldiers at gun-point, literally. She and her survi ing sons declared feud. When the old woman passed away in the '20s, her prized possession was a soap bowl....made from the press gang leader's skull....<br />The plot, tactics, and language fit the time period well. I love the writing. Now I see I must run down all your books! I believe the editors at Baen will be honest about how the dialect will sell, but I like it. <br />There were no real hero's in this era, through the settling of the frontier. Only survivors...JohninMd.(HELP?!??)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-44900654380967229382016-04-03T13:52:28.922-05:002016-04-03T13:52:28.922-05:00It was my understanding that back in those days th...It was my understanding that back in those days the town lawmen were paid a pittance with the understanding that they took a rake off the businesses dealing in vice of one sort or another.<br />And the good church going folks turned a blind eye as long as it was all kept on the other side of the tracks.Uncle Larhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04008207593205949098noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-50483006136902890552016-04-03T11:59:30.714-05:002016-04-03T11:59:30.714-05:00Event though the dialogee may have been authentic,...Event though the dialogee may have been authentic, it gets in the way of the reading flow for me. That was my biggest issue. If the dialogue is more modern I think I'll really enjoy it :)TheAxehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04328271483659507053noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-44809566207960354192016-04-03T11:58:05.509-05:002016-04-03T11:58:05.509-05:00Seems it will be a good read to me. No problem wit...Seems it will be a good read to me. No problem with grammar or meaning in any way.<br /><br />michaelAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-88594011825961050412016-04-03T09:56:57.868-05:002016-04-03T09:56:57.868-05:00I thought it was good. It's been a while since...I thought it was good. It's been a while since I read 19th century memoirs (mostly Grant, Sherman and other Civil War figures) and your tone seems about right though some of the word choices jarred a bit. "Vicious" in the first paragraph? <br /><br />You sometimes tend to use chains of adjectives and adverbs which can slow the narrative flow, and, perhaps related, push too hard, using some redundancy or near redundancy. For example, "the stillness was broken by a shrill call" and, two sentences on, "It was a woman's voice."<br /><br />Or you could say he comes from Britain.<br /><br />The border country was certainly a dangerous place. Just ask Josey Wales' family.Peter Bnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-36524108186720668032016-04-03T09:12:45.290-05:002016-04-03T09:12:45.290-05:00Well, I had no problem with the way he spoke, but ...Well, I had no problem with the way he spoke, but perhaps my language has been “coarsened” a bit, too. There's something Dave Drake wrote in, I think, the forward to Ranks of Bronze that might apply.<br /><br />That book is about a Roman legion that was bought by aliens (rather than Asians) after a defeat, and carried off to the stars to fight in their wars far from home. A reader complained to the author about the way the characters spoke. Apparently (my opinion), that reader was expecting a more “Roman” veracular that ends up being a mismash of Elizabethan English and some earlier.<br /><br />Dave responded, and here I am paraphrasing from memory, that he could have wrote the whole damn thing in Latin, but then very few people could have read it. If he was going to write about Roman soldiers in English, why the hell wouldn't he write the *kind* of English soldiers use today?<br /><br />While I have no problem with any “coarseness” seen so far, if you feel you have to change it, you could do worse than following the example of one I'd argue is in the top five science fiction writers of our time. Soldiers cuss. Former soldiers in civilian life, especially in “frontier” type situations still cuss, too. And speak bluntly. That doesn't change the character of the story.<br /><br />Good luck with the writing. This one sounds like a book I'll be buying as soon as it hits the shelves.Dan Lanenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-50080945247736580922016-04-03T09:05:05.201-05:002016-04-03T09:05:05.201-05:00I found that the dialect slowed down the reading a...I found that the dialect slowed down the reading a little, at first, but not to the point that I would give up on reading it. It did help set the tone, style, and authenticity for the story, and I wouldn't complain if it was used throughout the book. That said, toning it down just a little bit (not removing it completely) would make the book a little more readable while still giving a feel for the times it's set in.<br /><br />It's a good start, and even though I'm not a big fan of Westerns, I'll buy it if you write it - however you settle the dialect question.Roger Ritternoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-76720319424538363382016-04-03T08:55:07.512-05:002016-04-03T08:55:07.512-05:00Didn't have a problem with the dialect. Sounde...Didn't have a problem with the dialect. Sounded in my head like some of my Southern relatives. Shooting the ambushers made sense based on the circumstances. I did note that Walt didn't shoot the woman.JOW3noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-19832697483680583442016-04-03T08:24:56.622-05:002016-04-03T08:24:56.622-05:00I might be inclined to try it (if such books were ...I might be inclined to try it (if such books were my taste), if only because there is at least some, very faint, possibility that the protagonist, who is ex-Confederate, will be portrayed as equally 'hard' and unpleasant as the Union men and not entirely written as the soiled knight, whose sins are not his own. Neither side was glorious, both were equally capable of producing bushwackers and men quite willing to seize opportunity however it presented. They were also both equally capable of producing very good men.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-75865395543546184602016-04-03T07:50:59.106-05:002016-04-03T07:50:59.106-05:00I liked it, warts and all. Get the book out and I...I liked it, warts and all. Get the book out and I'll buy. <br /><br />Shut up and take my money, already! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-59160934084201890862016-04-03T07:46:30.909-05:002016-04-03T07:46:30.909-05:00Ha, I am on the other side of the equation of a lo...Ha, I am on the other side of the equation of a lot of folks here. My people are from Mississippi, but one of my gggggrandfathers was a carpetbagger. He married one of the local belles, and they had a couple of children. Shortly after his second child was born, he was killed by a brick thrown through a window at him by a disgruntled former Confederate soldier.<br /><br />Daviddoofushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01013708641448832087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-65972337656320654172016-04-03T07:39:05.849-05:002016-04-03T07:39:05.849-05:00It rings true, very few spoke "King's Eng...It rings true, very few spoke "King's English" back then, and the body count and 'action' are true to the time period... Write it! ;-)Old NFOhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16404197287935017147noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-12285331499957402232016-04-03T06:18:19.225-05:002016-04-03T06:18:19.225-05:00I've been a writer in the past, and have had g...I've been a writer in the past, and have had good editors and good critique-ers. There are some hard lessons in writing.<br /><br />Each piece, whether it's an editorial in a newspaper, a short story, or a novel, has to stand alone. It is what it is.<br /><br />You must kill your own babies. Sometimes a carefully worded sentence, or an artfully constructed paragraph simply doesn't fit. It's your job to delete it.<br /><br />You cannot defend your work. If you need to explain something, then you didn't do a good enough job writing it in the first place. The only people who get to defend their work is that writer of a thesis or dissertation as part of the scholastic process. The rest of us must let the work stand alone. It is what it is, not what you'd like it to be. The audience decides what it is. <br /><br />I was writing back in the day when a writer had to print a manuscript and mail it to a publisher. I have rejection notices from some of the biggest names in the business. I have also published several things. The internet and self-publishing have changed many things about the process, but they have not changed the idea that the written word is powerful. <br /><br />Keep writing.Pawpawhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14959820068377494313noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6244999628674918029.post-66312801456283426822016-04-03T05:35:10.141-05:002016-04-03T05:35:10.141-05:00Peter,
I have no problems with the story, so far. ...Peter,<br />I have no problems with the story, so far. The action flows along, and the language seems fine to me. It fits the historical era, I think. Westerns aren't a favorite of mine, but I've read a few, while reading many thousands of books in various categories over the last fifty + years.<br /><br />As someone else mentioned, the boy completely ignoring his wounded father seemed a bit off. On the other hand, he would have been close enough to probably determine his father's condition.<br /><br />Shooting the two was warranted by their reaction to the boy noticing The mounted rider across the clearing. It goes far beyond "furtive movements" as justification.<br /><br />I've no reservations to him waiting for the other son, and how he handled it. I'd have done the same thing in his place. I would have been inclined to ambush any group that was engaging in that sort of activity. I might have considered hunting for them, in fact. That sort of thing would be safer with a few friends along, though. <br /><br />Leaving the last horse would appear to be a waste. Granted it was tired, but if unburdened, it might have been able to hang with the group. If it was uniquely marked, though, taking it along might be hazardous. Always nice to have reasons or motivations for the characters actions.Willhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00722792638246578812noreply@blogger.com