Doofus Of The Day #104, #105 and #106

Doofi are thick on the ground today, it seems.

#104 is a collective award to the Canadian prison authorities responsible for this dumbassery.

Canadian prison authorities were forced to release a 450-pound (205 kg) drug gang member this week because he was too large for his cell, the Journal de Montreal newspaper reported on Wednesday.

Michel Lapointe -- known as Big Mike -- was arrested in September 2006 and received a five-year sentence in May this year. The paper said he could not fit on the chair in his Montreal prison cell and when he went to bed, his body protruded six inches on either side.

A letter from the authorities to Lapointe said: "You have been detained for more than 25 months and your prison conditions are difficult because of your health".

The authorities also cited the refusal of two other facilities to accept the 37-year-old. He was freed late on Tuesday.

Y'know, a thought occurs to me. If they'd already had him in custody for the past 25 months, couldn't they have put him on a diet, or something???? How much did the Canadian taxpayer have to pay in food bills, to allow him to get that fat - not to mention maintain his weight?

Doofus #105 is Huseyin Kalkan, mayor of the town of - wait for it - Batman, in Turkey.

Filmmaker Chris Nolan is being sued by a town in southeastern Turkey called Batman.

Batman's mayor, Huseyin Kalkan claims Nolan and film studio Warner Bros used the city's name without permission and is suing them for royalties from The Dark Knight.

"There is only one Batman in the world," Kalkan said in a statement, reports Variety.

"The American producers used the name of our city without informing us."

The mayor will produce evidence of his city's origins to show that it predates the celluloid Batman.

The character first appeared in 1939 in DC Comics' Detective Comics #27.

Methinks Mayor Kalkan is dreaming dreams and seeing visions - I suspect of dollar bills floating around his head - instead of focusing on reality. I wonder how the Turkish courts will see it?

Doofus #106 is Paul Snelson of Northampton in England.

A man was in prison today for affray after phoning police investigating his crime to tell them their witness appeal was wrong.

The appeal, released the day after the incident at the Sharman Road lake in the St James area of Northampton on May 19, said a man had approached an angler, grabbed him by the neck and demanded his fishing kit.

But after it was published in the press, Paul Snelson effectively shopped himself by calling Northamptonshire Police on May 21 to complain that the appeal details were incorrect.

He claimed he had not approached the victim, and said he had instead been acting in self-defence. The call led to his arrest and he was charged.

Snelson, 20, of Caledonian House, Argyll Street, Northampton, was sentenced at the town's Crown Court yesterday after pleading guilty to affray.

He was also sentenced for two counts of actual bodily harm which he admitted in a previous hearing, and one count of arson.

He was handed a 30-month sentence, concurrent for all offences.

I'm sure the police were absolutely delighted to hear from Mr. Snelson about the mistakes in their witness appeal . . . and promptly showed him the consequences of his own errors!

Life would be rather boring, wouldn't it, without the occasional Doofus to lighten things up?



Peter