Today's Doofi are two Russian tourists who recently visited Florida.
Two Russian tourists who challenged a Florida law prohibiting sexual relationship with a porcupine have had to undergo a lengthy treatment for genital inflammation.
Anton, 32, and Yevgeny, 30, residents of St. Petersburg, were spending their vacation in the United States with a group of friends, Life.ru website reports.
At some point in their journey, the two got hold of a booklet listing the weirdest US laws. Since they were in Florida, their attention was drawn to a Florida law prohibiting sex with porcupines.
After a good deal of whiskey, the Russians felt curious about what might have prompted the law, and went in search of the animal.
Within one hour, a porcupine was found, and Anton and Yevgeny were drunk and brave enough to take off their pants and approach it.
The next morning, both were standing at the Cedars Sinai clinic in Los Angeles, where amazed doctors plucked porcupine needles from their penises.
Had the two not fled from Florida quickly enough, they would have had to face the law they had breached.
Back in Russia, both men had to undergo a lengthy treatment of inflammation caused by the porcupine needles.
I'm not quite sure how an encounter with a porcupine in Florida led them to a hospital in Los Angeles the next morning. There's a little matter of an entire continent between those locations: and sitting in an airline seat, with porcupine quills in the most sensitive portions of one's nether regions, would be . . . ah, interesting! Still, I suppose the Russian journalists may have got their cities or hospitals mixed up, or something may have been confused in translation.
Any comments involving pricks, pricking and the like will be looked upon askance!
Peter
Another issue with this story, beyond that of the tourists getting to California from Florida under their circumstances, is that the range of the North American Porcupine does not extend southward on the eastern seaboard to Florida. Or did they break into a zoo? Details, details,... We'll probably never know. I imagine them as just a bunch of "Wild and Crazy Guys", a-la Steve Martin/Dan Akroyd.
ReplyDeleteJust a note, I very much enjoy perusing your page, with all the fascinating and entertaining items presented in such a splendiferous manner.
I'm surprised that Florida needs a law against having sexual relations with a porcupine, since that could be the defining instance of a self-punishing act!
ReplyDelete"Any comments involving pricks, pricking and the like will be looked upon askance!"
ReplyDeleteIn that case, I don't have anything to say. :)
I knew Russians were tough, but damn.
ReplyDeleteI know nothzing... :-)
ReplyDeleteI am sure they got enough needling once they got home.....
ReplyDeleteI doubt that it's true. The document in the picture says "Blood plessure", "Docror's name", and refers to "LA Florida". It seems unlikely that it's a real Cedars Sinai form.
ReplyDelete