Doofus Of The Day #360

Today's winner comes from Bali.

A teenager collapsed during his marriage to a cow he had earlier been caught having sex with after claiming it had flirted with him.

Unemployed Ngurah Alit, 18, was seen in a Bali paddy field standing naked behind the animal.

He claimed he believed the cow was a young and beautiful woman, and it had seduced him with flattering compliments.

He was then forced to marry the cow to cleanse the coastal village of Yeh Embang of the bestiality.

But during the ritual Alit passed out as locals and police – drafted in to keep journalists at bay – looked on and his mother began screaming, according to Detik.com.

One villager said: ‘Poor kid. He’s actually a quiet kid.’

Alit quickly then became a widower when his new bride was drowned in the sea as part of the Pecaruan ritual. Alit was only symbolically drowned and bathed on the beach.

Chief Ida Bagus Legawa declared that the village had then been ‘cleansed’ from the ‘defilement from the incident.’

Just how does a cow 'flirt' with a man? I've been in the presence of rather more than a few cows, and even helped to milk them. They may be udderly delightful, but I've never felt that they had the hots for me. (On the other hand, a couple of bulls made their intentions crystal clear; but while they involved horns and penetration, the latter was undoubtedly non-sexual in nature!).

I feel rather more sorry for the poor, drowned cow than I do for the young man . . .

Peter