I had to laugh at this report.
A Florida man has been arrested after he was accused of stealing a pickup truck and driving to a Space Force base to warn the government about extraterrestrial and mythical creatures.
Corey Johnson, 29, was arrested Friday at Patrick Space Force Base by local deputies after he "attempted to get on base," according to an arrest citation.
Johnson reportedly explained to authorities "he was told by the president" to warn "the government there was US aliens fighting with Chinese dragons."
Johnson allegedly took control of a Ford F-150 several days prior to arriving at Patrick Space Force Base and he didn't know who the owner was, according to local authorities. He was charged with grand theft of a motor vehicle.
He told authorities the president had also instructed him to take the truck.
There's more at the link.
You just knew this had to be Florida, right? Florida Man strikes again!
I wonder what the "Guardians" thought about that particular call to action? I have visions of a miscreant E-4 being ordered by a senior NCO to prepare to interrupt warring dragons and aliens. "Er... I don't see that listed in my job description, Staff Sergeant. How's about you show me how it's done? I'll make the popcorn!"
Peter
As with most Florida Man stories, probably not actually from Florida.
ReplyDeleteYeah, well, you just wait and see. Those aliens are on their way and they will land in a bus, all the way from the Rio Grande. ;-)
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ReplyDeleteWhat I find concerning is the President might have actually given these orders.
ReplyDelete@George is right - the most believable part of the story is the President giving those orders.
ReplyDeleteAlso, probably not Chinese dragons - Europeans are more likely to align with aliens.
They didn't listen to the radar operators at Pearl Harbor, either.
ReplyDeleteI find myself in agreement with George and Dragon Lady.
ReplyDeleteI remember watching a few years ago a special (documentary?) on TV about Cowboys vs Aliens. A documentary about these patriot US Aliens fighting Red Chinese Dragons might make a better special.
ReplyDeleteI'm reasonably certain a dragon with no ECM & no stealth features would be easy to target/track on a modern radar. F-22 vs dragon - I'll bet on the Raptor.
ReplyDeleteAs for the Aliens, Jeff Goldbloom already showed us how to deal with them, just have to hack into their alien OS with your Macbook & give them a virus.
Aliens and dragons....Larry Correia, call yer office!!!
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