Tuesday, October 27, 2026

Skippy, renewed

 

I'm sure all of my veteran readers know of Skippy's List:  "The 213 things Skippy is no longer allowed to do in the U.S. Army".  Some examples for those who haven't encountered it:


7. Not allowed to add “In accordance with the prophesy” to the end of answers I give to a question an officer asks me.

10. Not allowed to purchase anyone’s soul on government time.

18. May no longer perform my now (in)famous “Barbie Girl Dance” while on duty.

29. The Irish MPs are not after “Me frosted lucky charms”.

33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.

34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.


Go read all the rest at the link.

Friend in cyberspace and meatspace, fellow author and blogger, Tom Rogneby, has now added his own extensions to Skippy's List.  Examples:


3. Tom is not allowed to tell the Bundeswehr liaison officer that he has moral issues with doing gas chamber training at a German base in Bavaria.

8. Tom is not allowed to whistle the James Bond theme while walking across Red Square.

15. Tom is not allowed to sign a flag-rank officer’s government BMW sportscar out of the motor pool for a nighttime run across Stuttgart and back.


I giggled all the way through, remembering some of the "war stories" Tom has exchanged with the other vets of the North Texas Troublemakers (and honorary members from elsewhere) during LibertyCon.  Go read them all for yourself.

Those veterans' story-telling sessions at LibertyCon have gone on for years at each annual gathering.  You could see in the faces of some listeners that they thought we were making up most of them;  but then, one of us would say something to totally jar them out of their disbelief, and make them realize that "Holy s***, these guys are for real!"  It's a lot of fun to see that reaction.  For example, I served in the South African armed forces way back when.  I once told the tale of tracking a Soviet submarine across the South Atlantic.  This produced visible skepticism from my audience . . . until a former US Naval Flight Officer among our number took up the tale.  He described getting orders from Norfolk, VA to take off at once if not sooner, fly to point X, and drop a sonobuoy pattern.  He landed it right on top of the same submarine we'd earlier advised Norfolk was on its way there.  Neither the US officer nor I even knew the other existed until a couple of decades ago, when I began telling the story and he exploded, "So it was you who dragged us off our scheduled assignment that day!"  We both still laugh about it.  Small world, small transatlantic war skirmish unpleasantness . . .

Peter


Monday, October 26, 2026

Sunday, October 25, 2026

Sunday morning music

 

I'm sure many of my readers have heard of comedian and musician Rob Paravonian.  From his Web site:


With the mind of a comedian and the soul of a musician, Rob Paravonian seamlessly fuses sharp comedy performances with top notch musicianship. This perfect blend is evident everywhere from his viral Pachelbel Rant, his observations on popular music, to his well-crafted original songs.

Rob’s act is accessible and he works with minimal profanity so there are few limitations on where he can perform or where his albums can be played. He regularly works comedy clubs and cutting edge venues in New York, as well as cruises, all-ages venues and corporate events.


For those who don't know his Pachelbel Rant, it's coming up on its 20th anniversary of going viral next month.  Again, from his Web site:


In November of 2006 I uploaded a video to the relatively new site YouTube and it’s hard to imagine what my life and career would be had The Pachelbel Rant not become as popular as it did. Looking back over 20 years I’m grateful for the fans it helped find me, the friends and peers it helped me connect with, and the opportunities it opened up.

If you knew me before YouTube, or are a fan of the Dr. Demento Radio Show, you probably know that the Pachelbel Rant is even older than 20. It was a bit I started doing shortly after moving to New York and it was a regular feature of my sets at The Big Bad Music Show at Catch a Rising Star. An audio recording from Catch made it onto my 1998 CD American Cheese, simply titled “Pachelbel,” and it got played on Dr. Demento in 1999, making the Funny Five in the summer and the Funny 25 at the end of the year.

I had a few other songs make it onto Dr. Demento in those years so I didn’t realize the unique potential the piece had until YouTube came along. And I didn’t know what to expect from posting it, videos of over 5 minutes were rare in those early days.

In 2006 I recorded video of a bunch of live shows to get the most current version of the ever-changing and constantly updated rant. I chose to upload the version from a show at Penn State because the audience was really energetic and, most importantly, the audio turned out really good. (For you tech nerds: I used an Audio Technica wireless lavalier mic, omnidirectional. I think I chose the make and model because Doug Stanhope recommended it in a newsgroup)

In the first few weeks of YouTube it got a few hundred, then a few thousand views. These were the days before social media allowed people to blast out posts to millions of people at once so word spread more slowly and organically. I plugged it on my blog and on MySpace (ahh, wistful sigh for MySpace), but it was when YouTube chose it as a featured video on their front page that it really took off.

A lot of college students started finding the video, either having it sent to them by friends or finding it on a site like College Humor. One of those college students was the granddaughter of George Carlin’s manager, who sent it to her dad and grandfather with the suggestion that I could fill in for Carlin’s regular road opener, fellow guitar comic Dennis Blair. That led to me opening about a dozen shows for Carlin between 2007-2008, which led to opening for Lily Tomlin in 2009 at the MGM Grand.


I enjoy his music precisely because he keeps it clean.  He doesn't need profanity or innuendo to be very funny indeed.  Congratulations to him on the two decades of success sparked by his Pachelbel Rant.  Here's the original 2006 version.




You'll find more of his music and comedy at his YouTube channel.

Peter


Friday, October 23, 2026

Issues that should be addressed in the election, but are being ignored

 

Coyote Blog has been published since 2004 by Warren Meyer, making it even older than this blog (which I began in January 2008).  It's been an interesting and thought-provoking read for most of that time.

In his latest article, Mr. Meyer addresses "Six Meta Problems That Should Be Issues in the Election, But Are Not".  It's a lengthy piece, but well worth the time for those interested in analyzing what our leaders should be addressing, but for various reasons are not.  He identifies these six issues:

  1. The US Federal budget deficit, source of inflation, high mortgage rates, and even the trade deficit;
  2. Federal Reserve Policy, which has created the recent K-shaped binodal prosperity profile;
  3. K-5 public education, which has hurt everyone but particularly people of color;
  4. Conflation of race with culture, which hinders discourse on everything from immigration to education;
  5. Complete misunderstanding about how political power works;
  6. Special Bonus Meta Issue: Wars of choice.

I can't possibly do an excerpt incorporating all of those elements, so I recommend (highly!) that you click over there to read them for yourselves.  To whet your appetite, here are the author's thoughts on public education.  Emphasis in bold print is mine.


If there is a true example of systemic racism in this country it is the crime against black children perpetrated by the public k-12 education system, and probably in K-5 (once kids get to 6th grade without reading or math they are likely never going to recover).  There has been no worse crime committed against African Americans in this country since Jim Crow.   And the craziest part is that some of the worst examples are in cities with all-black mayors, city council, and school board members.

Take the example of East St Louis.  Here is the school board in E. St Louis -- not many proud boys there.   East St Louis spends over $25,000 per student and has a 12:1 teacher ratio  (the national average is about $18,000 per pupil and 14:1).    Teachers earn beetween $70,000 and $80,000 a year before benefits for about 9 months a year of work.  The student body is 96% black and US News report that in E. St Louis  "4% of high school students tested at or above the proficient level for reading, and 7% tested at or above that level for math."  Well no surprise that Blacks are struggling when freaking 96% of them graduate from public school systems like this without being able to read.  This is a f*cking crime, and it has nothing to do with white leadership or funding.

This has to be fixed, but in large part the various governments in this country have focused on working hard to NOT fix it.  That is because every time there is a standardized test that points out this failure to educate black children well, it is first dumbed- down, and then made optional, and then eliminated.  Which is insane – its like deciding that the solution to too many cancer diagnoses in some particular area is to stop testing for cancer.

Politicians are often susceptible to cargo-cult thinking and nowhere is this more obvious than in education.  At some point years ago politicians looked at successful people and noticed that successful people typically had college degrees.  Most of us would have said, “Sure, that is because a college degree means they have gained some knowledge, demonstrated critical thinking, can write and do math at some minimum level, can be focused and complete tasks responsibly, and have dedicated themselves to achieving difficult goals over long periods of time.

But politicians don’t think this way – they are not very good at parsing cause and effect.  So if successful people have college degrees, they figured that if we handed out lots more college degrees then there will be more successful people.  But since the K-12 education system could not produce enough qualified people to get into college, then standards had to be lowered, testing requirements eliminated, and high school grades inflated.  To help unprepared folks graduate, new majors with absurdly low standards were invented, grades were inflated and use of AI was winked at.  Not surprisingly, none of this has helped black well-being very much.  All the college DEI and affirmative action in the world is not going to help most black kids because it is 10 years too late -- they were failed by the system way back in K-5.

To complete the sad irony, the very traits that contribute to prosperity and for which college degrees were a proxy – hard work, focus on long term goals, critical thinking, discipline, deferring gratification – have now been labeled by supposed “supporters” of the Black cause as representing whiteness and to be avoided as racist.  Had the KKK come up with a plan to screw the black race in this country, I don’t think they could have done a better job.

Unfortunately, change is difficult since the teacher's unions have an iron grip on public education and many blue state politicians who owe their elections to union cash and get-out-the-vote manpower.  All the extra money we have poured into public education over the last 20-30 years, and there has been billions of it, has mostly been captured by public school employees, both teachers and especially the growing cadre of administrators.  The only possible way is to break the monopoly -- a monopoly far more destructive than companies like Comcast Cable ever were -- is with school choice.  Parents have got to be empowered to move their kids out of the failing monopoly schools.  As a bonus, school choice would quiet the culture war in that parents who want their kids taught there are 53 genders or just 2 can find appropriate schools for their children.


There's much more at the link.

I don't always agree with Mr. Meyer on everything, but in this article, I think he's hit several home runs.  I doubt our current crop of ideologically blinkered politicians will benefit from it, but nevertheless, go read the whole thing.  If enough of us make enough noise about these things, perhaps we can begin to change the calcified channels of politics . . .

Peter


Thursday, October 22, 2026

Listen for the still, small voice

 

As the mid-term elections draw near, the political turmoil around the world is being reflected in our own national politics.  There's order, counter-order and disorder;  there are threats and counter-threats;  there's propaganda and publicity material out the wazoo.  Sometimes it's hard to think straight, what with all the noise about the past, and the present, and the future.

Speaking as a Christian, I think it's very important for us to understand that the wisdom of God is not to be found in the midst of all this shouting and tumult.


The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”

Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

(1 Kings 19:11-13)


Ignore the political winds, and earthquakes, and fires.  For we who believe (and even for those who don't, for that matter), God is still in his heaven and is still in command of all that is.  It's his voice we need to heed, not the screeches and cacophony of those who love their own voices too much.

Peter