The idle musings of a former military man, former computer geek, medically retired pastor and now full-time writer. Contents guaranteed to offend the politically correct and anal-retentive from time to time. My approach to life is that it should be taken with a large helping of laughter, and sufficient firepower to keep it tamed!
> that's sick! I heartily agree. A man old enough to grow a beard wearing a "romper" is indeed sick.
Or did you mean something else?
Two other thoughts: 1. they need to have a potbellied model for maximum verisimilitude; 2. slip that thing southwards and you have the mother of all vagina dentata nightmares. Ewww. (The "sideways Asians" thing redacted for sake of decency ;-)
It's printed backwards: while one might enjoy the spectacle presented at the male stand-up plumbing when the wearer has to relieve himself, no one's there to appreciate it; and anyway, for art to properly imitate life, the face should on the back, with the mouth centered over a suitable trap door flap in the back.
Bonus: Like certain animal species, this reverse-printing arrangement would also dissuade attacks from the rear, by making predators think they were under surveillance, and/or frightening them away with the imprint.
I herewith sign it over to public domain, in fond hopes that someone will forward it to the marketer of this sartorial abomination forthwith.
Personally, if I were to stamp his visage on anything, it would be on the individual squares of toilet paper, particularly those marketed in South Korea, Japan, and Guam, if not Beijing.
If someone does that, my royalty shall consist of a free six-pack of those rolls, and one steak dinner at the establishment of my choice.
7 comments:
Words fail me...
> that's sick!
I heartily agree. A man old enough to grow a beard wearing a "romper" is indeed sick.
Or did you mean something else?
Two other thoughts:
1. they need to have a potbellied model for maximum verisimilitude;
2. slip that thing southwards and you have the mother of all vagina dentata nightmares. Ewww. (The "sideways Asians" thing redacted for sake of decency ;-)
EEEEKKKKKKKKK!!!!!
(runs off in horror)
I don't know which is worse. That...thing, or the idea that a grown man would even consider wearing it.
Now, where's the eye bleach?
It's worth it to mess with Big Brother's automated facial recognition. :-P
It's printed backwards:
while one might enjoy the spectacle presented at the male stand-up plumbing when the wearer has to relieve himself, no one's there to appreciate it; and anyway, for art to properly imitate life, the face should on the back, with the mouth centered over a suitable trap door flap in the back.
Bonus: Like certain animal species, this reverse-printing arrangement would also dissuade attacks from the rear, by making predators think they were under surveillance, and/or frightening them away with the imprint.
I herewith sign it over to public domain, in fond hopes that someone will forward it to the marketer of this sartorial abomination forthwith.
Personally, if I were to stamp his visage on anything, it would be on the individual squares of toilet paper, particularly those marketed in South Korea, Japan, and Guam, if not Beijing.
If someone does that, my royalty shall consist of a free six-pack of those rolls, and one steak dinner at the establishment of my choice.
Carry on.
The sickest part is the prices!
Post a Comment