I thought I'd heard everything. I was wrong.
In what sounds like a “South Park” episode, Japanese scientists have developed a procedure that allows lab animals to “breathe” out of their rectum.
In a new study published last week, scientists using an enema of oxygen-carrying liquid proved that oxygen-deprived animals — and maybe people — can be saved via their bottoms.
According to the New York Times, Dr. Takanori Takebe, of the Tokyo Medical and Dental University and the Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Medical Center, started alternative oxygen-delivery research during his father’s struggle with lung disease.
While ventilators are helpful, they’re not always available and can break. “We clearly need different strategies to help out patients with severe lung failure,” Dr. Takebe told the Times.
. . .
Takebe and his team ... began squirting an oxygen-packed liquid into the rectums of mice and pigs who’d been induced into oxygen-deprived hypoxia.
“The mice started walking around again; the pale skin of the anesthetized pigs turned a healthy pink,” the times reports.
“They are completely recovering from the very, very severe hypoxia,” Takebe told the paper. “That was really astonishing to me.”
There's more at the link.
Oh, the issues this raises . . .
- I've heard of bad breath, but breathing through the rectum promises a whole new level of halitosis!
- What if you cough? The results could be disastrous! As for a sneeze...
- Would constipation now kill you, because you couldn't breathe through the blockage?
- How the hell do you use a handkerchief or nasal tissue down there when you get a cold?
Verily, the mind doth boggle . . .