Monday, December 12, 2016

Doofus Of The Day #940

Today's award goes to a rather . . . uniquely skilled . . . driver in the Florida Keys.

Florida Highway Patrol troopers say a two-vehicle crash Tuesday at Mile Marker 21 on Cudjoe Key was caused by a 37-year-old woman driver who was shaving her bikini area while her ex-husband took the wheel from the passenger seat.

"She said she was meeting her boyfriend in Key West and wanted to be ready for the visit," Trooper Gary Dunick said. "If I wasn't there, I wouldn't have believed it. About 10 years ago I stopped a guy in the exact same spot ... who had three or four syringes sticking out of his arm. It was just surreal and I thought, 'Nothing will ever beat this.' Well, this takes it."

If that weren't enough, Megan Mariah Barnes was not supposed to be driving and her 1995 Ford Thunderbird was not supposed to be on the road.

There's more at the link.

Leaving aside the propriety (!?!?) of her ex-husband driving with her to meet her boyfriend, the thought of shaving one's bikini area while driving a moving vehicle is just . . . I don't know.  For once, I'm at a loss for words.  A bump - or an accident like the one described in the article - might have led to a lot closer and more permanent trim than she wanted!



Minecraft Chuck said...

Just another example that proves reality doesn't need to make sense.

The idiots, they shall always be with us.

Mike_C said...

Carl Hiaasen's latest novel, Razor Girl may well be based on (well, inspired by) this story.

John ShootBetter said...

I believe Carl Hiaasen said something to the effect of, "all a fiction writer needs for inspiration is a subscription to the Miami Herald."

DaddyBear said...

Well, she's got the women who put their make-up on in traffic beat.

Anonymous said...

It's South Florida, a truly, uniquely-"different" region, all-'round (Having lived there for a few years - in Palm Beach County - I can speak from personal experience); moreover, from the description, it's in the Keys, so...even MORE so...

People reading Hiaasen's "novels" sometimes imagine he writes purely-fictional stuff - trust me; though some of the details MAY be a bit "embroidered"...only the names have definitely been changed, to protect ol' Carl as well as (perhaps) the guilty.

Tal Hartsfeld said...

Pedestrians and bicyclists:
BEWARE!!! ...of the wayward motorists and their oversized/overpriced monstrosities