Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Trying to blog amid a crescendo of peace

Sounds odd, doesn't it? But that's what it's like at the moment. I'm on a busy cardiac health ward, the busiest in the city (and the best, in Ambulance Driver's not-insignificant opinion - he says I did a very wise thing in asking to be brought here), but so are a lot of other cases involving heart attacks, mutters, murmurs and plain ol' stutters. And all of them seem to have brought Bubba, Miz Bubba and sundry friends and relatives out of the woodwork to play.

Example 1: This afternoon. I look up to note a young boy and girl watching me eagerly from my partly-open room door. After exchanging polite pleasantries, I ask them to close the door behind them. They don't close it, and they don't leave. I buzz for the attendant.

Attendant: C'n I help yew?

Me: Yes, would you please escort these two kids to their family, and close the door behind them?

Attendant: Aw, Mary an' Maxwell won't bother ya none. They jus' wanna hang out here in the afternoons ta see if somethin' interestin' happens, like ya die or somethin'. Make a good school report for them, that would! (Smiles at me encouragingly, as if to say, "What are you waiting for?")

Me: Perhaps, but I don't want them here, thank you. Kindly remove them.

Attendant (Staring at me blankly): But, Mistah, yew jus' don' get it! This is f'r their school!

Me: And would you like me to tell you what you, and they, can do in, to and with their school? With sleigh bells on?

(In all fairness, the hospital had no idea of the situation, and was mortified when I got hold of a supervisor and pointed it out. I suspect the employee concerned is due for some fairly terminal counseling. Still, it's a valid example of some of the joys of living here.)

Other distractions so far have been an overload of visitors, exacerbated by the opening yesterday of a new section of the rebuilt hospital, so that visitors have been trooping around in confusion trying to find patients whom they know damn well were here yesterday, but who today seem to have evaporated like Soylent Green. (Hint: Don't use this exact comparison. How do I know this, you ask? Trust me. I know this. Now, anyway. Srlsly.)

My chest drainage tube and catheter came out yesterday, so the odds are pretty good I'm going to be kicked out today or tomorrow (Tuesday or Wednesday) to recuperate at home. This will be a long, slow process, but we'll tackle it one day at a time, as always.

Not much to post apart from that. I'll hopefully have more interesting things to write about after I get back into circulation.

Thanks for the continued good wishes, y'all. They're very much appreciated.



Anonymous said...

Hospitals are excellent places to go when you have a mishap, and even better places to leave when you're able. Take it easy, push when you're supposed to, and get the healing done. I'm glad this was no worse than it turned out to be. I know you'll be uncomfortable for a while, but push through the discomfort like the trouper (trooper, too) you are.

Homer said...

Once again, we learn that hospitals, as is the case with most businesses, are maintained for the comfort and convenience of the staff.

I don't deny that the overwhelming majority of hospital staff, quite unlike the average business, understands, and delivers on, their mission of providing good patient care. There are, however, a sufficient number of those who fail to link the performance of small details to the overall success of the endeavor; it takes a surprisingly small number of such individuals to damn the rest.

Look forward to your escape, Peter, and anticipate with relish the opportunity to continue your convalescence in more comfortable surroundings. In the meantime, we'll continue our gentle urgings to bless you with quick recovery.

John Peddie (Toronto) said...

You'll be back and up 'n about faster than you can believe, after what you've through.

Amazing what they can do these days. Friend of mine had a big by-pass operation about 25 years ago-they kept him in for about a month.

Today? 5-6 days; and a week after discharge, you'll be walking around the (new)neighbourhood quite handily.

Just wondering if the stress and exertion of your recent move might have brought this on.

Worst is already far behind you. Besides, a fella's got to get out of there to get a decent meal, and get away from all those sick people.

Bryn, North Wales, UK said...

I see hospital food is still..... hospital food..... whichever country we are in!

Try & take it easy, if possible :-)

Noons said...

Unreal how much surgery has improved.

20 years ago, quadruple bypass would mean a stay of a few weeks in the bad-food-hotel. Now you go home in less than 7 days!

I got my gall bladder removed 4 years ago, went home the day after and was back at work three days later. Not too long ago, it would have meant one week in hospital and three weeks at home.

Continuing the stream of good thoughts.

Julie said...

Glad to hear that you're on the mend ... I know how frustrating being in hospital is (stuck on bed rest for a week during my last pregnancy).

But at least you're getting some blog fodder.

Betty said...

I'm glad to see you're better. Another friend of mine had quadruple bypass surgery around a year ago and went home in a week and was back at work the next, with a lovely story of how he actually flatlined for a while (something to ask your doc, if you have a morbid curiousity to know if you were actually dead at some point). Take care.

Farmmom said...

I'm so glad to hear you are doing well. Be careful not to overdo it when you get home.

Dave S said...

Better to have "Mary an' Maxwell" hanging around to see if you die than "Myers and Franks" hanging around to make sure you do.

But neither is still better than either.

Glad you're doing well.

Dave S

OldCop said...

I'm so glad to have you back my friend, I look forward to your works. Make it home soon!

raven said...

Well , look at it like this- if Obamacare was in operation you would already be popping out of some strangers toaster.....

Rova said...

So, eat all the food, get on your feet and start doing laps around the floor as soon as possible (if you're not there already), have a comfortable bowel movement, and get home where you can recover in peace ASAP!

Rebuilding core strength will take a little while, and we both know you can do it! When you get up to 25# and 3 reps on bench and butterflies, let me know and I'll see what I can do to get a compatible compound bow to you so you have an excuse to let off steam outside!

Oh, and as to such types as the wandering children? A spitwad with a bit of peanut butter works wonders. . .

Brian Dale said...

"...who today seem to have evaporated like Soylent Green."

Ah, Peter, you're back on form. You brighten my day, sir.

Anonymous said...

It's always great when they start removing things attached to the inside and outside of you!


Matt said...

Have some more well-wishes; glad to hear you're doing well. Pity about the invasion, but it sounds like you'll be clear of it soon.

SpeakerTweaker said...

...after I get back into circulation.

No pun intended, right? Okay, it sounded funny in my head...

Anyhoo, I'm glad you're mending well, and I wish you all the comforts of home.

Just don't forget to ask for Help:)


Anonymous said...


Best wishes and continued rehab success.


eriko said...

(pr sounding bit on)
What before would have killed you on site now put you in intensive care. What would have put you in intensive care puts you in a general ward after a day or so. What would have put you in a general ward is now out patient. (to poorly quote someone else)

I have had several bits and pieces removed (or cleaned up after a little mishap.) I have never spent a night in the hospital yet (yah it will happen.) Yes there maybe some issues with health care in the U.S. but the drive to profit a lot of the "simpler"stuff really efficient.

(pr sounding bit off)

I am glad that things are going well for reasons mentioned in another comment. I hope you get some spicy food soon.

Rachel said...

And while you were in the Unit, my dad and his partners were the ones taking care of you! That's part of why you were in such good hands. Heart attack and bypass complication rates have significantly decreased since the intensivist program started.

You didn't meet my dad though. He was off.