As a former pastor, I can assure you that almost all the jokes, warnings and admonitions going around about how ministers need to keep on the good side of their organists, choir leaders and musicians are all too true. Now the Telegraph publishes a hilarious description of how the music side of the church can strike back when provoked. Here's an excerpt.
Christian Research, a polling and research group asked its 2,000 strong “Resonate” panel of churchgoers for their views on church music and organists.
Of those who responded, half said they had noticed an organist slipping unexpected tunes into services.
Among examples cites was that of the organist in Scotland who had fallen out with some of the elders in the Kirk but got his own back by inserting a thinly disguised rendition of “Send in the Clowns” as they processed in for a Sunday service.
Elsewhere, a vicar sacked an organist after he played “Roll out the Barrel” at the funeral of a man known to have been fond of a drink.
In one decidedly high church congregation, an organist punctured the mood of reverence as an elaborately dressed clergyman processed back after the gospel reading – by playing the theme tune to The Simpsons.
Another congregation found themselves passing around the collection plate to the strains of “Money, Money, Money” by Abba.
. . .
Stephen Goddard, of Christian Research, said: “It's an oft-repeated adage in church circles – ‘What's the difference between an organist and a terrorist? - you can negotiate with a terrorist’.
There's more at the link. I'm still smiling . . .
Peter
6 comments:
I once played a series of baroque style variations on the theme of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"...
Do NOT mess with your organist!
When my father (a lapsed Catholic) attended church with my stepmother (a Presbyterian) and they sang the Doxology (the collection song) my Dad would always change the lyrics after "Praise God from whom all blessings flow..." to "Come on you guys, get up the dough!"
This was always followed by the traditional elbow to the gut by my stepmother.
gfa
Our organist is the pastor's wife. 'nuff said.
When I was at Flat State U, our church organist did baroque improvisations on the Alma Mater as the recessional one week. He also admitted to almost doing the "Imperial March" from Star Wars for a parishioner's [number redacted] wedding.
The organist at another place I used to worship played the composition that was used as the theme for "The Starhustler" and did it for the introit.
LittleRed1
The "Ship of Fools" covered this sorr of thing about a decade ago. You can still (beverage warning) read it at http://www.ship-of-fools.com/features/2003/pdfs/organists_behaving.pdf
One of the funniest things I ever experienced in church...
Picture it - a Pentecostal church. The preacher is preaching his sermon when suddenly, he spots one of his oldest congregants(90+ years old)in the pew who had been out sick for a long time.
"Oh look!", he says. "There's Mrs. Kowalski! (Not her real name), back from the hospital!"
Then he goes on to tell about how old Mrs. Kowalski had been a member of the congregation since the church was founded many years before and was the original piano player. He goes on and on about what a wonderful pianist Mrs. Kowalski is and continues by asking her if she would play something for them.
Mrs. Kowalski nods yes and then toddles on up to the the platform, sits down at the piano, where she proceeds to play a near perfect rendition of...
You guessed it - "Roll Out The Barrel!"
Well - it brought down the house. Everybody in the place - except the preacher - was hand clapping and foot stomping right along with her. And when she finished, she got a standing ovation.
I have never seen a preacher with a redder face, but I have to give him credit. He thanked Mrs. Kowalski and continued on with his sermon as if nothing had happened.
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