Doofus Of The Day #64

I'm not sure whether to call Antonio Vasquez a "doofus" or a "pervert". Judging by the news report below, he may possibly be both.

A burglar who broke into a California home rubbed spices over the body of one of two men as they slept in their rooms and then used an sausage to whack the other man in the face and head before he ran out the house, Fresno County sheriff's deputies said.

Lt Ian Burrimond, describing the crime as one of the strangest he's ever heard of, said a suspect was found hiding in a nearby field a few minutes later and taken into custody on suspicion of residential robbery.

Deputies, he said, had no problem linking the suspect to the crime.

"It seems the guy ran out of the house wearing only a T-shirt, boxer shorts and socks, leaving behind his wallet with his ID," Burrimond said.

The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying spices to one of the them and striking the other with a sausage.

Both the spices and the sausage, Burrimond said, reportedly were obtained from the victims' kitchen.

Burrimond said the money was recovered, but that the sausage used in the attack was discarded by the suspect and eaten by a dog.

"That's right, the dog ate the weapon," Burrimond said. "I tell you, this was one weird case."

Well, I suppose a sausage could be considered a weapon. After all, the British call them "bangers"! As for the spices, that wasn't a very sage idea, was it?



Peter