Today's award goes to two inebriated idiots in Arkansas.
Charles Ferris, 50, and Christopher Hicks, 36, were drinking Sunday night on the back deck of Ferris’s residence when they came up the bright idea to shoot themselves.
Ferris, who was wearing a bulletproof vest, told Hicks to shoot him, according to the affidavit. Hicks obliged, firing a single round from a .22 caliber rifle into Ferris’s chest. While the vest stopped the bullet, Ferris was left with a painful welt on his chest.
Hicks then donned the vest.
Ferris, who would later tell cops that he was “pissed” about being shot, confessed that he “unloaded the clip” into Hicks’s back. None of the five rounds penetrated the protective vest, investigators noted, but Hicks “was bruised from them hitting him.”
When Ferris subsequently sought medical treatment for the shooting injury, hospital workers summoned police.
There's more at the link. A tip o' the hat to reader Snoggeramus for providing the link.
Hicks is particularly lucky. When a bulletproof vest is shot, the fabric in the area of the impact becomes stretched and torn, so it's no longer as bulletproof. If a couple of shots had impacted on top of each other, he might not be alive today to tell police what it feels like to be an idiot!