Today's winner is from Lynn, Massachusetts.
"The brakes to [Reynolds'] pickup truck failed on the decline of the roadway just before the entrance to Mack Park," one of the responding officers wrote in the log. "As a result he opened his drivers door and put his left foot out trying to stop his truck."
When that didn't work, Reynolds reportedly attempted to turn his truck up a hill to the right side of the road, but police say it caused him to fall out of his open door.
The truck drove over his left leg, rolled further down the street - luckily without involving any other vehicles - and crossed the road before hitting a fire hydrant and coming to a stop.
There's more at the link.
What on earth inspired him to think that his left foot could brake a pickup truck weighing several thousand pounds? His calves would have to be the best-developed in creation (and his shoes would have to have pretty powerful treads) to make that work!