Thursday, May 28, 2009

It's always someone else's fault!

From Colorado comes the news of a tire-slasher who simply couldn't help himself - according to him, anyway. (The report's from a British source, hence its spelling of 'tyre'.)

A man arrested in Colorado on suspicion of slashing the tyres of around 50 vehicles told police that he blamed his vandalism spree on his relationship with his mother, the fact that he got braces when he was younger, and radiation.

The 31-year-old man, identified by police as Alexander Kabelis, was arrested after he was spotted crouching behind a police car in Boulder, Colorado. The vehicle had one of its tyres slashed. The man was followed from the scene by a police officer, and arrested.

According to police, he admitted to slashing the tyres of 46 different vehicles in the past month, including nine police vehicles.

Upon being apprehended, the man gave police a lengthy list of reasons for his crimes. Firstly he said that he was 'frustrated' about his relationship with his mother, according to police spokeswoman Sarah Huntley.

He then added that he was angry about losing his license a few years ago, and complained that he had recently been 'buzzed' by a police car. After that, he suggested that the fact he had got braces in the 1990s might be to blame.

Finally, he posited that radiation from Colorado's disused Rocky Flats nuclear weapons plant might be behind the tyre slashing.

Uh-huh . . . and since there's no nuclear waste at Rocky Flats at all, just what is it about the place that made him do that? Ancient microbes uncovered during tunneling?

This reminds me of another report, also published this week, which alleges that 'perceived racism' (note, 'perceived', not necessarily actual racism) might be responsible for weight gain!

Perceptions of racism -- from being treated with suspicion in a store to unfairness in employment or housing -- can heighten stress levels and affect health, research has shown. A new study from Boston University links these smoldering signs of racism to weight gain in black women, suggesting a possible explanation for the their higher obesity rates compared to white women.

. . .

At the end of the trial, all the women had gained weight. But the women who said they felt higher levels of racism gained more weight and had bigger waist-size increases compared to the women who felt the least racism. That held true after accounting for factors such as education, geographic region, and beginning body mass index.

"Racism is real and it has real effects," Cozier said in an interview. "It can result in real changes in the body."

There's more at the link.

Both stories are complete and utter bull, of course. If Mr. Kabelis wants to stop slashing tires, Step 1 is to put down the knife! If any person wants to lose weight, or not gain it, Step 1 is to put down the damn donut! Don't feed your face, you won't gain weight. Q.E.D. Even more to the point, make sure that the 'racism' is real, not just a figment of your imagination. I'm sick and tired of hearing militants allege 'racism' when nothing could be farther from the truth. Just because you perceive something doesn't mean it's factually true - it might mean only that your perception is warped to the point of batshit insanity!

Excuses, always excuses. Sheesh!



Farmgirl said...

Well, in defense of my state... Boulder isn't really a PART of Colorado. It just happens to be situated inside our borders.

The People's Republic of Boulder (no shit, look it up) is rarely claimed by the rest of the state, let alone when one of their yahoos turns up like this.

LabRat said...

Blogger Steve Browne pointed out something extremely logical with regard to the weight gain study- one thing that definitely has to do with your weight, along with your self-efficacy in general, is how much control of your life you attribute to internal, controllable factors, and how much to outside, uncontrollable forces.

If you lean toward the latter, you're probably more likely to be fat, and might you be more sensitive to perceptions of racism as well? Hmm.... could be.