Sunday, January 8, 2012

Doofus Of The Day #559

Our first Doofus award of 2012 goes to a rather strangely-named man in Wisconsin.

... police received a call Thursday afternoon about alleged excessive drinking and drug use near the park. When police arrived, they spotted the man near the tennis courts and said he suspiciously put his hands in his pockets when officers — recognizing him from a past arrest — approached.

“Officers contacted a subject they had previous dealings with, identified as Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop,” police spokesman Howard Payne told the Capital Times.

He had previously been arrested in another park after police found a loaded handgun in his backpack April 2011, according to the newspaper.

Payne said a search of Zopittybop-Bop-Bop’s property Thursday turned up a knife, marijuana and drug paraphernalia.

He’s been charged with carrying a concealed weapon, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana and a probation violation.

According to Madison’s Capital Times, Zopittybop-Bop-Bop legally changed his name from Jeffrey Drew Wilschke to the more polysyllabic moniker in October.

There's more at the link.

Mr. Zopittybop-Bop-Bop doesn't earn our award for getting arrested. He doesn't even earn it for changing his name to so weird a moniker. No, he earns it for choosing a name so daft that everyone who hears it is almost bound to remember it - and him. Way to stay inconspicuous, bro! Pick a name that'll have every cop on the force talking about you, and sharing photographs of you, and staying on the lookout for you, even if only for lighthearted amusement!



CGHill said...

I can deal with "Beezow," and perhaps even "Zopittybop-Bop-Bop," but I'm sorry, no one should have the middle name "Doo-doo."

Wraith said...

Point of order. It's merely spelled "Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop," but it's pronounced "Throatwarbler Mangrove."