Today's award goes to an unnamed manager in a supermarket in England.
A chef was stunned to find she was almost banned from buying two limes from a supermarket - because they could be classed as a weapon.
Marisa Zoccolan, 31, popped into the new Asda supermarket close to her home in Wallsend, North Tyneside, to pick up some groceries, including the citrus fruits.
But when she tried to pay for them at the self-service checkout, the message 'amount exceeded, authorisation required' flashed up.
An assistant then came over and told her that more than one lime was deemed a weapon - because the citric acid could be squirted in someone's eye.
Marisa, a self-employed caterer said: 'I thought they were taking the pip, but the assistant told me the same applied to lemons.
'I've heard of supermarkets banning people from buying things before, but this is just crazy.
. . .
'I asked her why. Was it because they can be thrown?
'But no, it's because they contain citric acid which could be squirted in someone's eyes. How ridiculous is that?'
Thankfully for Ms Zoccalan, who lives with partner Jacqui Nicholson, 37, and dog Doobie, the assistant allowed Marisa to eventually buy both of the fruits.
'Yes, they vetted me and let me buy them.
'I clearly don't look like I'm going to carry out a drive-by fruiting any time soon.
'If that citric acid rule applies to lemons and limes, it must apply to grapefruits as well.
'Maybe oranges are safer because they're less acidic?'
There's more at the link.
It later emerged that Asda had no such policy - it was a misplaced sense of humor on behalf of the local manager. Even so, if he wouldn't let her buy more than one, that scurvy Limey knave clearly had no sense of history!