Friday, May 13, 2011

Reasons to love Bagram

I'm still laughing after being directed to, a combined blog and 'love list' compiled by someone who's based at that city in Afghanistan.

(LANGUAGE ALERT: It's not always safe for work!)

Here are some selected examples of 'Reasons Why I Love Bagram':

8. Having an AC that leaks water onto power outlets.
13. The constant threat of instant death.
16. The poetry on the bathroom walls.
34. The contractor uniform - Khaki cargo pants, North Face Parka liners, hiking boots, wraparound shades, and dingy beige baseball cap (Black watch caps optional).
45. Searching for "craigslist bagram" and finding out that 95% of the male population here is looking for other males.
46. Stealing the signs that say "MINES".
73. Sitting down in a bathroom and realizing that whatever is on my leg, didn't come from you.
75. Sitting down in a bathroom and realizing that whatever is on my leg, didn't come from me, either.
86. Finding footprints on the toilet seats in the porta-potties.
135. The brilliant idea to use fist sized rocks as walking paths to test ankle agility and the motion sensing lights that turn off in the dark while you are stumbling over said walking areas.
153. Telling "Princess" even though she's a legit desert 10.5, she'll revert back to a real-world 4 at the very next airport.
179. The beauty of Coyote Creek. Especially down stream from Smack Town where the gray and black water trucks dump into it. Reminds me of gentle, flowing streams back home. Minus the land mines, turds, and Hepatitis A through E.
278. For the knots in my laundry bag. The reason it takes so long to get your laundry back, is because someone spends hours, tying nine knots in my bag.
304. Listening to 2 Full birds (i.e. Colonels) bitch about the lack of diet pepsi, after I just came from a FOB with no food but MREs.
308. For the Jet Engine Test Stand that seems to only be operational at 3am. Nothing says "Welcome to Bagram" like 40 min of afterburner noise right next to your sleeping area, after just getting in country the night before.

There are many more at the link. (Remember the NSFW warning, though!)

Veterans of other combat zones will read them, smile wryly (or laugh out loud), and be able to contribute a few from their own memories . . .



Nebris said...


Anonymous said...

I love "I Love Bagram"! The site is a list of every thought in my head written down. I often revisit the site from work or home just to see what's new. It's update almost everyday, so I'm always entertained. I've even turned my wife onto the site just so she knows what we're going threw over here in Afghanistan. :P